collaboration

i had a discussion once with sam about what inspires her to succeed. what she said amounted to defeating people, and it left me unsettled. something felt wrong, what would she do if there was noone to defeat? then we had a discussion in my ethics class about competition vs. competence. being able to work on the basis of one's competence and not let competition be the motivating factor. that settled the question. and then i came across more live examples of this difference.

iese's case study method is all about collaboration. we study together, we learn from each other and we grow with each other now and over the years. thats what the value of this network is. its not just carrying wine bottles to casual gatherings, its about being able to trust people around you that they have the ability and willingness to help you in your trouble and that they will do it without expecting a payment.. its a good turn that will deserve a good turn in the future. i tried explaining the same to manu also. for him the whole point of studying is to be the top of his class. he doesnt want to help his classmates, because that may lead to them doing better than him. my parents would also question me when i helped my classmates, but for me it always benefited me too. the discussion helped me understand the concept better. and i tried telling my brother that if you help someone who genuinely needs help, you are helping the class move faster. coz if you dont help, then the student will ask the professor, which will then slow down the entire class. if the person doesn't need help and is just wasting everyone's time, even then by trying to help him you might be able to get him interested.

its also probably the same when it comes to relationships. its not you vs. me. its you and me. who is making the choice and who is adapting to the choice - thats not collaborating in a relationship. thats competing, comparing and that doesn't last long. i spoke to my mom and she tried to give me the black and white picture of women having to take care of the family or not being able to have one because they are too focused on their career. the man is the bread winner. but there is a grey area - where the man and the woman share - and the family is a result of this collaboration, a product of mutual understanding and a balancing act based on mutual strengths.

i have understood this value and have started collaborating for work, for dgdw, for my courses, for my business idea. there is this power of brainstorming with like minded people - intellectually and exposure-wise too. right now i cherish this in the iese envt. being surrounded by people who understand the way you think and even without you having to explain it all. and who help you think further by probing your thoughts in the right direction. this will soon go away, when its time to face the real world. right now is like a preparation time, to fine-tune your ability to collaborate with people and work on mutual strengths. true ability to lead is when you can identify people's interests and get them to leverage that. the time to face the real world will also be a time to ask yourself - am i ready to test it outside iese?