setting a pace

have you ever had the feeling that life is just whizzing past you and you don't have the time to do anything? like sitting in a train watching the fields go by and you are not able to capture the beauty and colours as much as you would like to?

last couple months have been like that for me. i was already thinking it must have been more - ages maybe - given the number of events that happened in the time frame. it is also shows in the lack of posts on my blog here. i hate to admit it, but frankly i haven't been able to dwell on observations enough to churn out a post and i miss it a lot! i have a few table napkins with thoughts scribbled over, but it will be some more time before they see the light of this blog.

its amazing how we get caught up in the routine of life. and find it justifiable to not be able to use the time for more enriching things in life. indeed we also start feeling guilty about "wasting" our time doing things such as talking to friends, sleeping a restful night, or having a well cooked and enjoyable dinner. it hit me today and here's why - two weeks ago one night i finally dragged myself out of home, for an iese-mba-style going out. i had been crawling into a blanket after 9 pm for the couple of weeks that i had been in barcelona after the break and citing reasons such as cold weather and lack of company to go out with. despite missing barcelona's trance music, particularly when i was in india. i guess that gave me the realization that "tonight's gonna be a good night" will be my MBA song. fond memories.

after that turning point of dragging myself out, i found a new reason to go out more often. rumours caught my ear that dgdw team is drowning and dying in work and stress. time to prove them wrong and time to show up how dgdw team can do classwork, organize dgdw and still come to the bows and dinners. (and gratefully not drain the pocket either). its not just about balance, it also about priorities - and aligning them all together to one single objective. i have to keep up with dgdw demands, read my cases, work on assignments, socialize with family and friends and still wake up for an 8 am class. i can do this, now and in the future. and i can keep my body healthy by regulating the food i eat and the exercise i do. thats the top priority and it can all be done at top speed.

so when you have the "life is rushing by" moment, here's is what you can do and it works for me. stop, unload, look around, take a deep breath, catch up on food, music and fresh air and then then get ready to keep walking. keep the pace without rushing yourself and you will meet all your deadlines. "World hold on" and thats another one of my MBA songs :)

art of seduction

is almost like that of hunting. you identify you target, and you know what you want from it. then you go about trapping it, after which you can do what you want, you can even kill it. i watched this movie - no country for old men - and the comparison is uncanny. the way they start with the scene of josh brolin shooting a deer. perched quietly and selecting his target and carefully aiming at its heart. he misses it. but in the end mafia does not miss him. after putting multiple people on his chase, they do finally get him. and of course you cannot miss the heartlessness of javier bardem. cold impenetrable eyes, chilling voice and expressionless face. a hunter to the core.

but i had also seen javier bardem in - vicky christina barcelona - where he plays a charming painter, warm eyes which are a pool of emotions, soft silken voice and a face that could well be a mirror of his heart. a seducer. and who could resist his charm? the sane or the insane, the fall is equally exhilarating and yet also equally delusional. i had watched the above movie with a couple friends and i wanted them to see the other extreme end of character diversity that javier could embody. as i described my impressions of the latter movie and i insisted them to watch it, one of my friends commented to me, "would you be seduced by such a man?" and then as i heard myself say, "absolutely" without missing a beat, i realized that in this role too javier was no more than a hunter. a hunter to the core. equally merciless, but with a different garb.

as i thought back, the pattern became clearer to me. and let me restless with the realization that attraction could well be the act of being trapped in a hunter's charm. and then my other friend broke down the analysis for me. a seducer creates this air of mystery around him. he will not answer any of your questions straight, he will only direct them back at you in a way that you would not expect. he throws you of your rational thinking by confusing you and that split second is enough to cloud your judgement by his silken voice and deep eyes. by then you have already become the hunted.

and at this point i would also like to quote from a very seductive person - "what you can touch you can have fun with." i leave it to you to interpret that in the above context.